Sunday, August 28, 2011

I've changed my mind ... I'm voting for Obama after all


Obama cutting vacation short

"Urging everyone in Hurricane Irene's path to prepare, President Barack Obama decided to cut his vacation short Friday and return to the White House for a storm he described as potentially historic. White House spokesman Josh Earnest said the president would leave Martha's Vineyard a day early."

That he would do that for us? Man ... what a guy ... what a president! And in honor of his holiness (we're not worthy), I'm going to nominate him for the Nobel Prize! I mean what are those poh peeps on Martha's Vineyard gunna do, without the Great and Powerful Chucklehead around?

And who's going to protect the Hamptons ... huh?

Along some of the area's fanciest streets, such as Meadow Lane where celebrities such as Calvin Klein live, mansions appeared empty and their windows boarded up. "There's no parties going on, that's for sure," said John Rist, owner of a local liquor store.

But, well ... the Reich Ministry knows best ... yeppers ... Mayor Michael Bloomberg: "Staying behind is dangerous, staying behind is foolish, and it's against the law," he said in a news conference from Coney Island.

Of course, not everyone listens to filthy Kapo Klowns: 'Entire Atlantic City seniors home refuse evacuation orders'. No. But of late, it seems far too many conswervos are in fact of the opinion, that Buraq Hussein might/could be reelected [and why we need to unite behind some Brylcreem Pepsodent RINO (man or woman)]. Peeps ... please ... Stop Sipping the F*cking KoolAid! It's real simple people. Yes, it is. You do not f*ck with people's families, their jobs, or their homes.
Buraq Hussein, and his butt buddy Bloomie, do it as a matter of course (even in their sleep). And why he has zero chance. ZERO. Of being reelected.

Maybe you're thinking 85 mph winds, or 33 mph winds ... wtf's the difference? Well, without the 85 mph winds, Buraq Hussein doesn't get his triumphal media blitz (CNBC: "Continuous coverage all day") ... I saved America, while Bush diddled Norlinz:

US President Barack Obama warned the US east coast was in for a "long 72 hours" as he led (we're really presidentin' now baby!) his government's response to Hurricane Irene at a disaster command center in Washington.

Obama on Saturday chaired a meeting [wow, he chaired a meeting! (Holy bat guano)] at the National Response Coordination Center set up at the Federal Emergency Management Agency's headquarters in Washington.

Saturday evening Obama convened a conference call with members of his senior emergency response team [he even picked up the phone! (It boggles the freakin mind)].

'Course, without Irene's charms, we wouldn't be witness (Sunday, 3:40 a.m. PST), to CNN's leel Andy, and Donnie. In some wild split screen action, both wearing rubbers (no bareback tyvm). Tag teaming Irene. Or, at 5:45 a.m. (PST), some other reporter in (wet) field, as the ginormous (one foot) surf/surge rolls in, and she gets her tootsies wet (OMG/the horror!). Screaming to her cameraman: "grab the mic, let's get out of here!" As she drop tosses the mic, and misses, into the water.

And just in case, y'all ain' fig'rd out today's (blog post title) theme (it could happen)? Apwil Foos!

(Many links via the Matt'ster)


Blogger Ronbo said...

Great polemic satire as usual!

Re-posted here with a link back to you.

Obama re-elected in 2012?

Does it really matter unless we shutdown most of the federal government and fire several million parasites...err bureaucrats?

Politicians come and go, but a bureaucrat and a government agency lives forever.

2:25 AM  

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