Sunday, April 23, 2006

P.E.T.A. Begins New Spring Campaign: People for People

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Washington - (AP) With the swirl of recent world events, and the domestic political temperature having risen, P.E.T.A have found themselves on the media sidelines. In consultation with their board of directors, and of course their PR firm Whacking Our Peepies All the Time (W.O.P.A.T.). P.E.T.A. have begun a new media offensive and operational reworking, dubbed People for People.

And having found that Hollywood types aren't just one note demagogues, that cry and whine only about the Manolo ish shoe of the week, but actually are diverse types who take an interest in personal items closer to home. The group came to the realization that ragging on their soul sisters and brothers for their fashion selections had become a somewhat dated public personality. So in an effort to wake up the normally sycophantic MSM hacks who act as P.E.T.A.'s house organ, they decided that a reinvention was needed. Not just a simple day spa makeover. According to head dingleberry, Ms. Clue Less.

Clueless went on to further elaborate: "we came to understand that sympathy comes from utter derangement, you know ..... killing yourself. Just like those Islamist whackjobs. So we said WTF, who is more deranged? Us or the Islamists? We couldn't put down the Chardonnay long enough to decide, but we felt that shouldn't stop us from emulating their highly successful PR campaign."

"In a concerted effort to save little bunny rabbits, kittens, moose, and other assorted dangerous wildlife we decided to enourage people to volunteer for youth in Asia. To willingly offer themselves up as a food source, you know .... People for People." Clueless went on further: "show the world what good little pinko's you are and follow us, your spiritual leaders. Serve peoplekind now! On a bun, on a roll, or simply au naturel with a tidy garnish."

Juan Cole the midwestern histrionics professor, and host of the website Hippies on Crack. After hearing the P.E.T.A. announcement volunteered to be the very first "People for People." In a statement seen on P.E.T.A.'s website, Cole was quoted as saying: "I hope they make me into a fruitcake" [editor: oh, that's a reach].

Also on P.E.T.A.'s website were further comments (from Clueless): "we were finding that we could no longer count on our longtime mainstays like the ole gray New York streetwalker, or the Washing Post ... who are busy helping Dana Priest pick out an outfit for her new position in front of a firing squad. Or even the LosAnglos/SUV Liberal Times, who are currently involved with their own re-organization. With a change not just in their mission statement, but also their name as well. Now calling themselves The Hiltzik and Masha Puppet Show, and which which will begin airing on the Dhimmi Central Uncomedy Network in May.




Basil linked with: Picnic 2006-04-24/Today's Picnic Basket/Articles Of Interest




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2 Comments:

Blogger Basil said...

Mmmmmm.... people

3:54 AM  
Blogger AnechoicRoom said...

People who need people,
Are the luckiest people in the world

With one person one very special person
A feeling deep in your soul
Says you were half now you're whole

No more hunger and thirst
But first be a person who needs people
People who need people
Are the luckiest people in the world .....

12:10 PM  

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