It's a Festivus Miracle!

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If ya have the exquisite pleasure of reading (smelling) ... the L.A. Daily News (and you're a libwuhl). You'da thunk Christmas had already arrived, three days ago, on November Second:

California turning a deeper shade of blue:

"Democrats' apparent sweep of statewide offices - led by Jerry Brown's return to the governorship - leaves California's liberal leaders with responsibility to repair the region's economy and Sacramento's reputation. If they succeed, activists and analysts said Wednesday, they could help to repair their party's brand nationwide."

Put down the crack pipe already Kevin (dude ... you've got blisters on your lips). And if ya think these freaks are a little off (their meds)? Then/well maybe ya wanna see something really REALLY scary? [Caution: NSFS (not safe for stomach [I warned ya])].
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(Sorry 'bout that).


And tis another day (and so) another pile of shite from ..... who else? Right, Hitler's Willing Executioners ... the Associated Press:

"Now a divided government could be taking shape, with President Barack Obama and ascendent Republicans facing only two options: compromise or stalemate."

Umm no Liz ... there ain' no Vaseline for Bambi. Sawry. He's gunna have to Ben Dover ... and take it like a man (the one he isn't, nor ever will be).

"If voters don't know what they want beyond something different from the status quo, how can a government deliver, much less one that's divided?"

Some body PLEASE stop smacking Liz with the idot stick ... willya?



The horror ....

BBC Journalists Go On Strike Over Pensions

"Thousands of BBC journalists have gone on strike in a row over pensions which will disrupt radio and television schedules."


'Obama heads to Asia after rebuke by voters'

"Rebuked by voters, President Barack Obama is turning overseas, heading to Asia for 10 days of diplomacy, tourism and dealmaking that could boost the battered chief executive and highlight his political skills on the world stage."

Couldn't we just buy him one of those booster seats ... (ya know) like they have at Dennys, for two year olds?



"RAPPER Lil Wayne was released from prison yesterday after serving eight months of a yearlong sentence for weapons possession. CBS News reports that his buddies are planning an 'elegant, extravagant evening of celebration and strippers to welcome him home'."

President Obama has just announced he will hold a satellite press conference (at 1 p.m. PST), aboard Air Force One [while en route to Indonesia (for his long planned Mooselimb bar mitzvah)]. To discuss this major breaking news story (of great import to the nation).

Meanwhile ... the Fed, they just keep printing more (and more) f*cking money. Gold keeps climbing ... the Yen, the Pound, the Euro ... same. And the Dollar? Now officially circling the drain. We ain't outta the woods yet, no ... not by a long shot. But we have been giving a glimmer of light, a sliver of hope, with which to hang on to. And we ain't letting go. Not until we march that b*tch right out the door, across the manicured lawn, and to the street. At twelve noon ... in front of three thousand cameras. Where the whole freakin Nation's gunna take turns, kicking his sorry stankbutt ... to the curb (enjoy the trip/fall Chucklehead!).