Tuesday, March 07, 2006

Hollywood launches new humanitarian program: Adopt a terrorist

'Some Gitmo Prisoners Don't Want to Go Home'

Fearing militants or even their own governments, some prisoners at Guantanamo Bay from China, Saudi Arabia and other nations do not want to go home, according to transcripts of hearings at the U.S. prison in Cuba. Uzbekistan, Yemen, Algeria and Syria are also among the countries to which detainees do not want to return.

George Clooney, president of the new international organization named SuggMo'sDeek (S.M.D.), said: "the world is not black and white, only in my Academy Award acceptance speech. We must do everything we can to insure that these mindless deranged murderers have a warm comfortable place to live. Where they can rest up, and plan their next bloodbath. We ask all panty waist libs, aging hippies, nihilists, commies, and other assorted wackos to give a place in not just their heart's, but also their homes."

A man from Syria who was detained along with his father pleaded with the tribunal for help getting them political asylum _ in any country that will take them. "You've been saying 'terrorists, terrorists.' If we return, whether we did something or not, there's no such things as human rights. We will be killed immediately," he said. "You know this very well."

Cloon the Loon went on to further say: "please help won't you, these killers now have nowhere to go. Call 1-800-BlowMo now" (Original link via http://www.iris.org.il/blog/)

Care and feeding of your psychopath:

After the United States invaded, he was sent to Guantanamo, where he said conditions were much improved. "Prisoners here are in paradise. American people are very good. Really. They give us three meals. Fruit juice and everything!" (Via http://www.opinionjournal.com/best/)

Career retraining for your cute pet beheading machine:

With your magnificent benevolence: a new career penning the screenplay of your latest liberal wet dream!

Spending quality time with, and getting to know your new adoptee's inner self.

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