The DNC's Handy Pocket Reference Guide to the 2006 Midterm Elections

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Am not.







Are too.







Am not.














I know you are .... but what am I?














Oh yeah .... well I'm made of rubber, and you're made of glue. Everything you say bounces off me and sticks to you!







Listen here Repub boy .....







If it swishes like a














And it sashays like a














Then it's a














O.K., mebbe just a little. That all you got?







No. We've got plenty of issues. In fact, I think I have another one right here .....







You're mother was Jewish.







What?






You're mother .... she was Jewish.







My mother?







That's what I said dipsh*t. Do I have to repeat myself?







No. Got anything else?






Give me a second and I'll try and come up with something.







O.K.














You're like ......







Bush.







Excuse me?







What ... are you stupid too? I said you're like Bush.







Bush, Bush, Bush, Bush.







I really don't know what to say. Please tell me you don't have any more?







Oh no ... we have lots of them.









The September Fund is a new 527 organization (whose) efforts are designed to clarify the differences between Republicans and Democrats. Prevail in key gubernatorial contests, (and) gain control of the U.S. House and U.S. Senate. SF intends to become an assertive voice defending against the negative.








I told you. We have lots and lots and lots of them ...... (neener neener neener).







Friday, October 27

Sam is on top of Mark Foley
(of course, feel free to stop reading when she gets to: Here's a sampling of the perverse messages he sent, if you haven't seen them already ....)



And some guy named Webb, is really big news today over at Drudge. For the life of me I just can't figure out why?



I'm looking at the calendar. I see it says October. I know in my heart of hearts, mind of minds, today is not April Fools Day. (I mean I could be wrong, right?). Then again .... someone peed in lefty's coffee this morning.




Saturday, October 28

Variation on a Theme

It isn't just politicians the expansive minds of the left are going after. It's lil ole bloggers like yours truly. Hard to believe this passes for thought, issue, insight, or editorial [maybe I'm just not bright enough to perceive the deeper hidden meaning :-) ,,,]. So, let's just say .... I'm quite flattered (you like me, you really like me!)



Elmo El Homo





Open Trackbacks:
Stop the ACLU/Wednesday Links, basil's blog/Blogrolling 2006-10-26.

Good Evening .... and Welcome to the 1st Annual Kim Jong Il Telethon!

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Hello I'm your host with the most, Bill Clinton. Yep uh huh thazz rite ..... the Lib Boss Man!

(applause)

At least until the missus officially tosses her keffiyeh into the ring. Then she'll own all my pants.

(laughter)

But enough about me. We're gonna have a rip roaring time here tonight, helping my good friend .... someone who needs no introduction, Kim Jong Il.

(applause)




Truly a man who is outstanding in his field. But .... do to sanctions that are now being imposed, will no longer be able to enjoy cognac by the tankard.

(boooo .... hiss)




I know, it kinda brought a tear to my eye too. So us few, us proud Defeatocrats have gathered together this evening to show our support for Kim.





Here at the live telethon studios, we're going to sip a few Cuba Libres .... and let it all hang out. To bring you one humdinger of a show. And while you, our TV viewing audience are being entertained at home ....





Celebrity operators will be standing by to take your pledges.





A bottle, a case ..... whatever you can afford? Perhaps you don't live near a BevMo outlet? Possibly they're out of Remy Louis XIII. Maybe you live in New England? There's no need to feel left out. Kim Jong will also be experiencing a shortage of lobster too. So, you Maine types can call in with your clawed donations as well. Live in the Caspian region? Some caviar will really help us out here tonight (no Servuga please).





Now here is the really sad part, Kim's elite sweeties are going to have to do without French perfume. Because of the evuhl rethuglican embargo on luxury goods. I know I can count on you, my Dear Friends in Beverly Hills, Bel Air, Malibu, RPV, and the Palisades. To kick in a quarter oz, a whole oz, or more of feminine delight. You Montecito types don't be shy now either. Shoot, I'm betting there's a blue blood liberal or two, still hanging out in Hope Ranch as well.




Give generously please so that Mr. Il can get his fill! I Thank You, and his johnson will thank you. G*d Bless.





O.K., let's all meander together over to the switchboard now, and see who's calling? Join me please .....




O.K. our first call .... Mr. Hugo Chavez is donating a signed copy of his new DVD, live at the U.N. titled What is That Smell? Thanks Hugo you're all right. I don't care what Danny Glover says about needing to go to the clinic.

George Soros donates his old Gulfstream V, so Kim can commie in style. What a guy George!

Here I see Mahmoud Ahmadinejad has donated a million barrels of oil to lift Jong's lugubriousness. Way to go Moo Moo! Hold it ...... you say you're not done? Beluga? Two pounds? Moo Moo you just take my breath away you little mooselimb deevuhl you.

And we have Khaleed Meshaal on the line right now. Hey Khaleed baby, what it be like? You're going to donate Clichy-sous-Bois, Arhus, Malmo all the other no go zones in Yurrup? Wowie zowie Khaleed, I don't know what to say. What's that? You don't want those sh*tholes anymore anyway ......you're coming to America?


And you say London is going to be an inferno in 2012 anyway .... Well hot dog dude! What's that? ...... ... Come again (I love saying that).




You're already here? Dang that was fast boy.


Well I say it's time to fire up the band. What do you at home say? Hit it boys and girls!





and sweet
sweet surrender
is all that I have to give



I only hope
that I won't disappoint you
when I'm down here
on my knees



sweet
sweet
sweet surrender



Diggit!



Go man go! Goosestep your partner round and round and dosey do ..... we'll be taking a short break now, but of course celebrity operators are standing by. Call with your pledge now!











Now that we are back from the break, man oh man do I have a treat for you! Always Al's favorite, here they are now, live ....

(applause)



The I'm on Ecstasy precision motorcycle drill team .....











Well it's been one heck of an evening hasn't it .... and well I'm feeling a little petered out. We're going to wind the show up, but we have one final treat for all of you. So join with me now, a big hand for live .... via satellite, the one the only Kim Jong Il !!!


(applause)





Hello Kim.






Kim?






Can you hear us Kim?






(What's he looking at?)


























Inbound: Dr. Sanity/Carnival of the Insanities, Lago in the Morning/NewsRadio 1360 (10-23-06), Fausta's blog.